Christmas in Korea

Christmas in Korea is a bit of a special thing. It's celebrated, yet it's not celebrated, and the way in which it's celebrated is completely different from how we celebrate in the west.

Christmas has really changed a lot since when I first came here 3 years ago. Actually, the first Christmas I celebrated here, I don't think I saw a single Christmas tree. But now, 3 years later, there are Christmas trees and decorations filling streets of Sinchon. Stores all over are playing Christmas music. Hell, there was even a Christmas market a few weeks ago. The Christmas spirit is actually here!

Now why is this surprising to me?

Here in Korea, Christmas isn't exactly traditionally celebrated. In the west, it's a religious holiday and family holiday. We get together with our families, open presents, and eat a huge dinner. But here in Korea, it's a couples' holiday. Christmas day is probably the biggest couple holiday of the year. Christmas is the day where couples flood the streets, look lovingly into each other's eyes, and pay for ridiculously over-priced meals and motels. So romantic.

Because Christmas is a couples' holiday, there generally isn't much Christmas spirit here in Korea. In the past, you might have seen a tree or two, maybe heard a Christmas song (but that was only played on Christmas day). But this year, people seem to really be embracing Christmas. Kind of.

I was walking this evening with my Korean friend excitedly talking about all of the Christmas trees and music and how it reminded me of home and family. My friend was generally confused as to why I would think of my family on Christmas. For my friend, Christmas is purely a couple's holiday. While I was happy about the Christmas spirit, he was depressed about it because he doesn't have a girlfriend.

This of course isn't to say that all Koreans treat Christmas like a couples' holiday. There are many churches that put on Christmas plays and celebrate on Christ on Christmas Eve and day. Yet they are in the minority.

So even while the spectacle of Christmas is growing here, it seems that the meaning isn't changing. It still isn't about the birth of Christ or being with family; Christmas is still a Valentine's Day like holiday that is just an excuse to go on a nice date with your significant other.

Gyopo

The word Gyopo (교포) is my least favorite word in the Korean language. Gyopo means a Korean who was not born and/or raised in Korea. For me, gyopo is a word that is filled with hate. Censuses show that roughly 7 million Koreans live abroad. With 50 million Koreans living in the South Korean peninsula, by using the term “gyopo,” Koreans effectively isolate 8% of its population.

For any person living abroad, it can be difficult. You long for home and miss everyday familiarities. Children born from immigrants oftentimes visit their home country rarely, if at all. So, for many who are the children of immigrants, there is often a sense of loss. Yes, they were born in this country, but in reality they are from another. This tends to be the case with my Korean American friends; they call themselves American, but at the same time, their true home is Korea. Yet with the word “gyopo,” it turns many Koreans away from Korea.

Gyopo is a harsh word.  It’s a word that really pushes Korea’s homogeneous mentality—you’re only Korean if your parents are Korean and you’re born in Korea. For my Korean American friends whom I have here in Korea, life can be a bit of a struggle.

One of my good friends is a so-called “gyopo.” Though he was born in Korea and has even done his military duty, he is still “gyopo”—not Korean. He speaks Korean fluently, with no accent, yet the Koreans around him reject him. He’s not Korean, he’s American. He dresses like an American, he talks like an American, he acts like an American. He’s not Korean. He’s American. We often have lunch together and he will tell me how often he is rejected. His Korean friends don’t want to have drinks with him or dinner with him. When working in group projects, he’s treated as the foreigner, not as a Korean. A family friend offered to set him up with his friend’s daughter but warned my friend, “Treat her like a Korean. You’re American, but you need to be Korean around her.” When he said these words he became depressed. He is Korean. He was born in Korea. Yet he did not grow up here. Therefore, he will never truly be Korean.

Many Koreans who live or were born abroad face the same struggles that my friend does. Often times, they don’t socialize with native Koreans, they socialize amongst themselves. Even in their “home” country, they are isolated. While not all non-native Koreans are treated like this, the vast majority are.

The largest population of non-native Koreans is located in China. They are known as the Chaoxian in China and as the Joseonjok in Korea, 2.5 million Koreans live in China. In China, they are not accepted. They are not Chinese. In Korea, they are not accepted. They are “gyopo.” For Koreans living in China, it can be a difficult road. They live in a country that does not accept them, and their home country treats them as if they are foreigners.  For the these Koreans, the Joseonjok, life is much harder. Unlike Koreans who grew up in western countries and tend to be much wealthier, Koreans who grew up in China tend to be much poorer. Since they don’t have as much money, they face more discrimination. They are often blamed for stealing native Koreans’ jobs and for crime. For Koreans born in China, they are the bottom of the racial hierarchy in Korea.

My boyfriend is a native Korean, born and raised in Korea. He spent two years in the US and speaks English almost as well as any native speaker. Anytime we’re out in public and Koreans speak to him and in English, my boyfriend gets excited. He’s a foreigner. He feels flattered that Koreans think he’s a foreigner, and it makes him feel proud. Yet sometimes I don’t think he realizes the implication of what being a Korean foreigner is like. Yes, he’s excited that Koreans are treating him as a foreigner as they do me, but being a true Korean foreigner is not that romantic. He doesn’t understand the isolation and discrimination that comes with being a “gyopo.”

Not all Koreans treat non-native Koreans like I have mentioned in this post. Yet the Koreans that do this have often lived or studied abroad themselves. It is oftentimes the Koreans who have had little to no international experience (whether that be from traveling abroad or even having a foreign friend) that treat non-native Koreans like “gyopos.”

“Gyopo” is a word that I hate. I wish sincerely that it was a word that didn’t exist. But it does and the stigma is there. I hope that one day Koreans can accept all non-native Koreans and treat them as equals, but that day seems like a long way off. 

Racism in Korea (Part 2)

Racism isn’t limited to being charged extra or being refused service. Young Koreans are just as guilty, though perhaps in a more innocent way. For some Koreans, having a foreigner friend can make them seem worldly. They’ll brag to their other friends that they have a foreigner friend; you essentially become their pet in a handbag.

Guys and girls will date foreigners just to learn English. Korean guys will try to hook-up with foreign girls to add a ”notch in their belt.” Foreign girls, especially Americans, are perceived as slutty, and we are approached as such. Foreign men are seen as sexual devients, trying to steal away the poor, innocent Korean women.

And if you’re a foreigner dating a Korea, be prepared for stares. Mixed race couples, while becoming more common, are still seen as an oddity. The automatic assumption is that the Korean is dating the foreigner to learn English. If a Korean girl is dating a foreigner, the couple will get dirty looks because they think that the girl is a slut. If it’s a Korean guy and a foreign girl, the foreign girl will be thought of as a slut. There have been many occasions where my boyfriend and I have gotten hate glares from people. It should be noted here that most of these assumptions and glares come from older Koreans.

My boyfriend is Korean and I’m an American foreigner. Even though we met in the US and have been dating for more than a year and a half, my Korean friends still try to warm me that he is dating me to learn English. Why do they keep telling me this? Because it is such a common practice for Koreans to date foreigners to learn English. I became mad at one of my students who was going to study in the US when he told me that he wanted to date an American just so he could learn English. What’s worse about this is that Koreans who do this don’t even see it as wrong.

This video is about 2 years old and caused a firestorm when it came out. MBC never apologized for its racist content and things like this still air on Korean news.

In summary, not all Koreans are racist, and to think as such is blithely ignorant. Yet racism does exist, and it’s a huge problem. Korea’s government is pushing for more foreign tourism and foreign businesses to enter Korea. They are riding the Hallyu wave and are encouraging its growth, which is great. Yet, if Korea truly does want more foreign tourists and foreign business, it must stop letting these racist attitudes go unchecked. Being barred from a restaurant, bar, club, or taxi simply because you are a foreigner is simply unacceptable. These businesses need to be held accountable for their actions if Korea really does want to become a part of the globalized world.