The Final Adventure

They that before you die, your life flashes before your eyes. For me, this didn’t happen—I just began to say my goodbyes.

Two weeks before my flight home, I began having very vivid dreams of a plane crash. Not one to be paranoid, I chalked the dreams up to stress and didn’t think anything more of them. Nonetheless, while my plane was still at the gate, I said a little prayer to God asking for a safe flight home.

Having been a frequent flyer my entire life, flying is not something scares me. So when the plane experiences turbulence, I merely shake it off, and think nothing of it, often times laughing a little at those who fear a little bump. So, when I become terrified of turbulence, it’s not a little thing.

When my flight reached the halfway point, we began to experience turbulence. I noticed that the turbulence was more severe than normal, and became a little worried, simply because of my haunting nightmares, but I told myself, “Cowboy up,” and continued watching the in-flight entertainment. The turbulence got more severe though, to the point where I was concerned. This concern was heightened when I saw flight attendants not walking, but running to their seats. I can tell you as a frequent flyer that this is not a settling sight.

The turbulence continued to get more severe, and I began to clutch my armrests for dear life. It was then I realized how severe the situation was—a flight attendant took a spot by the emergency exit. I looked to my right, to the Korean pastor sitting by my side. I found comfort in that there was a man of God sitting next to me in what might be my final moments.

As the turbulence continued, I began to pray again, telling God that I was not ready to die; I just wanted to see my family on Christmas. And then—freefall. What felt like 7 seconds was probably in reality only 1 or 2, but it was enough time for me to stop thinking about not wanting to die, and I began saying good-bye.

Yes, there were screams. I’m sure I was screaming, too. When the freefall stopped, I felt that my face was wet with tears. I wasn’t sure when I began to cry. The turbulence continued, and I prayed that we would not have another freefall. Today was Christmas and I just wanted to see my family.

After another 20 or so minutes of turbulence, the plane finally evened out after rerouting itself. I unclamped my hands from the armrest, fingers now cramped, hands now white. Around me, several people got up to use the restroom for they had soiled their pants. I was surprised I hadn’t.

I looked at the people around me, all of us still breathing heavy and wincing at every bump. It was then I noticed that my pinky was throbbing, and I took a look at it. It was now swollen and blue, and I realized that in my fear, I had broken my pinky by clamping down so hard on my armrests.

For the remainder of the flight, I instinctively grabbed my armrest at any bump. I noticed people wincing with every wrong movement of the plane. I think I can speak for everyone when I say that when we landed, I almost kissed the ground.

Now I sit in the San Francisco airport, waiting for my next flight. I’ve never been one who is afraid of flying, but now, I don’t know if I can bring myself to board. 

Packing for Home

They say that packing to go to your destination is the hardest part, but in reality, it’s packing to go home.

Coming to, you only have to worry about what to bring, and what ever is missing can be purchased upon arrival. But, packing to go home, whatever you leave stays behind. Whether that be a sock, a friend, a favorite coffee shop, or boyfriend. If these are not packed, they stay behind forever.

These things last as memories. They last a receipts kept in you wallet, ticket stubs tossed in your purse, pictures on your camera that you never got around to uploading. The strongest thing you have to keep is a memory of brilliant smile.

What I remember here? Who will I remember? Will I remember the feeling of 삼겹살 (samgyeopsal, pork belly) as it burns my tongue, the bitter taste of 소주 (soju, Korean vodka) as I do it in “원셧!” (One shot!), the sight of street vendors selling every knick-knack that you can think of?

As I pack things into my suitcase, I trace my hand across my Korea University shirts. At Texas Tech, I only own one shirt that I bought quickly before a football game, but here, I have over 6 shirts with Korea University proudly displayed on the front along with several sweaters of the same variety. Why have I collected these? Will these things be my memory of students who have given me my most cherished memories?

I can only hope as I pack my remaining souvenirs into my bag, that I will return to Korea one day. I have lived here for so long and have become so comfortable calling it my home. How can I not come back when this place has become all that I love and know?

The Death of Kim Jong-Il

There have been reports for the past 3 years that Kim Jong-Il’s health has been ailing, so it came as no surprise to me when he was pronounced dead this morning.

Like all of my friends in Korea, I had the news on when the TV announced that he was dead. At first I was shocked, but in an instant it was overtaken by unease. What does this mean for the Koreas?

Kim Jong-Il’s successor, Kim Jong-Un, is barely 30, and in a culture that values age over almost everything, it’s hard to see him holding the reins of the country. My fears are like everyone else’s, what will happen now?

In reality, there is little to think and only to watch. With the news from North Korea so tightly guarded, it is hard to believe what is really happening in the country. One can only know what is truly happening until it happens outside of the country.

All that we can do now is pray and hope that nothing ill will come of this event, and even hope that maybe this will lead to these two lands divided becoming one again.  

The Last Day

I didn’t really think about. With projects and finals crushing down on me, I didn’t even have time to think about. Sleepless nights, caffeine overload, a burst eye vessel from too much studying—so many things to make you go numb to what you’re supposed to be feeling.

I raised my head from my desk as my 5 a.m. alarm went off, warning me that I was stupid and fell asleep while studying. Groggily, I rubbed my eyes, and stretched, cramming for the last few precious hours I had before my last final. As I slipped on fresh clothes and packed up my bag, I looked at my table and saw my camera. In an instant, emotion ran to the back of my throat—today was my last day at Korea University.

I began cursing myself, angry that I let myself get so overwhelmed with school that I didn’t let myself enjoy the last few precious moments that I had at this wonderful place. Before running out the door, I quickly snatched my camera; I don’t know why, the day was grey and I would be meeting no one since they were just like me, too absorbed in their books.

Rushing to the bus, I ran through cold air, trying not to think about my final, and least of all, my time coming to a close. When I arrived at the school, I sat in the business lounge, like I had so many times before. Seated in a plush red chair, I looked around at the astounding room. Glass reaching the ceiling three stories high, couches and tables neatly aligned for comfort and efficiency, students leaning over papers, desperately cramming in the final minutes before their test. I breathed deeply. Would this be my last breath here?

When the final ended, I walked out of class, thinking of going straight to my bus stop so that I could go home and get some much needed sleep, but I paused as I took out my gloves. I wanted to stay here, just for a little bit longer. So I shoved my gloves back into my bag and began to walk down Korea University’s famous underground passage. With each step I took, I inhaled deeply and memorized every detail that I could.

Will I remember how my shoes clack on marble floors? Will I remember the smell of books from the libraries that line the hall? Will I remember the intricate patterns on the floor that I have ignored so many times before? Will I forget the frustration every time someone suddenly stops in front of me? As I reached the end of the hall, I looked back at the crowd of students behind me, desperately trying to get into a study lounge. Will this be the last time I see it?

I left the warmth of the underground to the harsh cold outside, but suddenly, it didn’t feel cold. I felt so warm. I looked around me as I watched students run to their final and couples meander down the street. I thought of the times when these people who I barely knew helped me in my times of need, people who barely knew me who would smile and talk to me when they saw I was alone, people who filled the university with the love and warmth that Korea is famous for.

As I walked around every last inch of campus, I remembered all the friends who I had met over the last year and a half. Who would I remember them 10 years from now? Who would remember me? Will I ever forget this place that I have called my home for so long?

I sat down at the bench near the main gate, looking at the gorgeous architecture that Korea University possessed, and began to be filled with bittersweet thoughts. My time here was been a blessing. The people I have met, the places I have been, I do not have the words to describe how wonderful they are. My life here has been nothing short of amazing, and I find myself shocked with how comfortable I am calling this place home. But…

Will I ever come back?

Rain Farewell Concert

I’ll say this right off the bat, I’m not a huge K-pop fan. Actually, I really don’t like it all. But, I have been living in Korea for such a long period of time that I figured I should eventually go to one. The problem was, I didn’t like any K-pop band enough to actually pay for a ticket to go and see them (with the exception of TVXQ, because they defy amazing).

One day, a friend of mine posted on Facebook about a free K-pop concert, and being college student, the word “free” instantly caught my eye. One of Korea’s biggest stars (if not the biggest), Rain (or Bi), was giving one farewell concert before his mandatory military enlistment, where he would be spending the next two years.

It was the perfect opportunity. One, it was free, and two, it was in Seoul, which meant that I didn’t have to pay for an expensive train ticket to get there (remember the whole not wanting to pay thing; that included transportation). So, I grabbed my roommate and we headed down to the concert.

Our first thought upon arrival was dear lord, we forgot how popular this man is. Though we arrived 3 hours early, there was still almost nowhere to stand and see the stage.

We eventually managed to find a spot, though we had a nice crane and tree blocking the middle of the stage. After standing for 3 hours, the concert finally started and the 10,000+ member audience roared with applause.

Rain sang with great passion (though he was having microphone troubles, which made his singing quite hard to hear at times, and displayed his signature (and amazing dance moves.

As the concert came to a close, we noticed that Rain had not done one thing—display his signature abs. He did not disappoint.

After drying off from dancing in the rain, Rain returned to the stage to say his farewell to the audience. He thanked us for our support for the last 10 years, and how wonderful it is that we turned out to say farewell to him. He talked about joining the air force, and that he hoped, when he returns in 2 years, that we will love him just the say as we loved him that night. There was not a dry eye in the audience.

But ending on a sad note has never been Rain’s style, so he left us with one final anthem, the Party Rock Anthem.

(They danced to this for about 10 minutes)

In the end, I was glad that I went. Rain proved to be entertaining and I could finally say that yes, I have been to a K-pop concert.

On an end note, RAAAAAIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!

Stephen Colbert vs Rain - Dance Off by stephencolbert

Injustice Against Foreign Women

This story is a little dated, but the what it tells is still the same today--there is little justice for foreign women who are assaulted here in Korea.

http://rokdrop.com/2006/03/15/sexual-assualts-in-korea/

I have several foreign friends who have been assaulted during my time here in Korea, and the answer from the police is always the same--no help, only condescending responses. Even those who work in the Women Clinics have been prejudiced against my friends, often calling the assaults against them their fault.

Last year, I was attacked in a stairwell by a drunk man. I was lucky enough to have a friend close by who heard my shouts and was able to pull the man off of me. The establishment that we were at called the police to arrest the man, and when they came, they took my friend's name and number as well as mine. Neither of us ever heard back from the police.

Last week, I went dancing in a popular club area here in Seoul. My friend and I danced until the club was closed, and while we waited outside for her friend to come and pick us up, we had men from the club come up to us and proposition us to go to a motel. It got to the point when they were grabbing and groping at me while I was yelling in Korean telling them to stop, let go of me, and stop touching me. When one of them forcefully grabbed my wrist and tried to pull me away with him, I went to my last resort and pushed against him with all my might, and told him in Korean to "@#$% off!" (Cussing in Korean is often a very effective way to make a Korean man go away). I managed to free myself from his grasp and ran away as fast as I could. I ended up running a little over a mile away before feeling sure enough and safe enough to stop. So when all other things fail, run, just run away as fast as you can.

Things like this should serve as a caution to all foreign women living here in Korea. Be careful. There are many Korean men who will invite you to go to a restaurant to drink or Noraebang (Karaoke) with them, and to bluntly honest, their motives are purely sex. So decline these invitations. Be aware of how much you are drinking (as well as what you are drinking because the spiking of drinks is becoming more commonplace in Korea now) as well as your surroundings.

If worst comes to worst, and you are assaulted, the US consulate here in Korea has provided some information on what to do, and where to get help.

http://www.asktheconsul.org/victims_crime_korea.pdf